1. I Am Not in Control
“God is in control” is definitely a Christianese buzz-saying. In Bolivia, I learned just how much power and freedom actually exists in me not being in control. There is a lot you can’t control when you are working 9 hour days in a boys rehabilitation home. There were times when I thought “well because I am here, nothing bad will happen” … and then things did. It’s one thing to say “God is in control”, and another to put action behind it and trust that He wants the best for us. Letting go of human desire to control requires being ALL-IN on trusting that God knows what he’s doing and He WILL work all things to His good. It takes starting every morning with “Jesus, I give you my day and I trust you”.
“We are confident that God is able to orchestrate everything to work toward something good and beautiful when we love Him and accept His invitation to live according to His plan.” – Romans 8:28
2. My First True Christmas
We sang. We laughed. We cried. We gave testimonies to the good things that God had done in 2017. It was like no other Christmas I have had in my life. You could feel the tangible presence of Holy Spirit in the room. Jesus was the primary thought of mind – not presents, not decorations, not food. Even 4 months later I have a hard time finding the words to clearly describe it. Young men and women who felt like they were at their lowest point in life so far chose thankfulness – they chose to celebrate what God has done and will do in their lives. I will never see Christmas the same way again.
The girls asked if we could sing Oceans not once, not twice, but THREE times that night! (note: The video is shot to specifically exclude the faces of the women living in the rehabilitation home)
One of my teammates (Amy) wrote beautifully about the experience here: Prayer Poured Out, Healing Poured Down on Christmas Eve
3. Seeing With God’s Eyes
About a week into the month at the boy’s house I hit a burnout point. The altitude sickness was wearing on our whole team (13,500+ ft. elevation), the cold was inescapable, and because it was the holiday season emotions at the house were high. That thought of “what am I doing here?” overwhelmed me on one particularly cold morning. I was unqualified and ill-prepared to do what I “felt” like I was being asked to do. That morning in prayer the Lord spoke loud and clear to me – “I want you to see with my eyes”. It immediately made sense to me. That was our purpose in the boy’s house. We were not there to counsel them, convince them to change their behavior, or save them in any way. God brought us to El Alto to just BE with them. He brought us there to BE an example of a friends that chooses to see them as new creations – to see them as HE sees them – to see them a His boys. This lesson continues to spiritually shift my sight of people and experiences in my life – of my past mistakes, of my relationships, of my family, of my friends, of grudges I’ve held, of hurts I havn’t let heal, and everyone I interact with.
Prayer: Father, I want your eyes. I want to see hearts first. I let go of my preconceived opinions and choose to walk in forgiveness everyday.
Loved reading your blog this morning! So awesome to hear of God´s work in all the lives when one is at their lowest point! That was a special Christmas indeed!!! And that Oceans song….that you learned in spanish in Chile, continues to minister to heavy hearts wherever you go!!! To just “be” with people and let them see Christ in you until they are ready to “hear” His words…..we must be patient and wait to share. Just being and praying for them is powerful and necessary to gain their ear. I was deeply touched through your and Amy´s account of this night. Praise God you took the time to write about it. Hope it´s in a journal and can never be lost….hope it will be shared with your churches when you report. May God continue to guide you and use you to “see” others and minister to others as He would!!! You are his eyes, arms, feet……..carry on dear brother……Coletta
I feel the same way about our Christmas spent together. So glad to experience this life changing journey with you!!!
RJ, I continue to be so inspired by the dedication to God you and Kayla are showing to the world. You inspire me with each blog post. I am particularly moved by your reminder that we all need to shift the focus of our eyes to people’s hearts, not their specific actions. I continue to struggle with that in many instances. Thank you for that blessing this morning. God be with you all.
Thank you following and praying over our journey Coletta! I feel like a LOT of things we learned from you, not just Oceans in Spanish, has blessed people in every country we’ve served. I miss you and James so much and we can’t wait to figure out a way to see you states side at the end of this year. Love you.
This life changing journey called the REST OF ETERNITY! 😉
What powerful eternal life lessons. Thank you for listening and sharing.