1. I Am Not in Control

“God is in control” is definitely a Christianese buzz-saying. In Bolivia, I learned just how much power and freedom actually exists in me not being in control. There is a lot you can’t control when you are working 9 hour days in a boys rehabilitation home. There were times when I thought “well because I am here, nothing bad will happen” … and then things did. It’s one thing to say “God is in control”, and another to put action behind it and trust that He wants the best for us. Letting go of human desire to control requires being ALL-IN on trusting that God knows what he’s doing and He WILL work all things to His good. It takes starting every morning with “Jesus, I give you my day and I trust you”.

“We are confident that God is able to orchestrate everything to work toward something good and beautiful when we love Him and accept His invitation to live according to His plan.” – Romans 8:28

2. My First True Christmas

We sang. We laughed. We cried. We gave testimonies to the good things that God had done in 2017. It was like no other Christmas I have had in my life. You could feel the tangible presence of Holy Spirit in the room. Jesus was the primary thought of mind – not presents, not decorations, not food. Even 4 months later I have a hard time finding the words to clearly describe it. Young men and women who felt like they were at their lowest point in life so far chose thankfulness – they chose to celebrate what God has done and will do in their lives. I will never see Christmas the same way again.

The girls asked if we could sing Oceans not once, not twice, but THREE times that night! (note: The video is shot to specifically exclude the faces of the women living in the rehabilitation home)

One of my teammates (Amy) wrote beautifully about the experience here: Prayer Poured Out, Healing Poured Down on Christmas Eve

3. Seeing With God’s Eyes

About a week into the month at the boy’s house I hit a burnout point. The altitude sickness was wearing on our whole team (13,500+ ft. elevation), the cold was inescapable, and because it was the holiday season emotions at the house were high. That thought of “what am I doing here?” overwhelmed me on one particularly cold morning. I was unqualified and ill-prepared to do what I “felt” like I was being asked to do. That morning in prayer the Lord spoke loud and clear to me – “I want you to see with my eyes”. It immediately made sense to me. That was our purpose in the boy’s house. We were not there to counsel them, convince them to change their behavior, or save them in any way. God brought us to El Alto to just BE with them. He brought us there to BE an example of a friends that chooses to see them as new creations – to see them as HE sees them – to see them a His boys. This lesson continues to spiritually shift my sight of people and experiences in my life – of my past mistakes, of my relationships, of my family, of my friends, of grudges I’ve held, of hurts I havn’t let heal, and everyone I interact with.

Prayer: Father, I want your eyes. I want to see hearts first. I let go of my preconceived opinions and choose to walk in forgiveness everyday.